An Investment Worth Making

10/29/2018

Fall is one of my favorite times of the year. Not only because the colors on the Minnesota trees are spectacular, but because fall is when I do my yearly retreat with my leadership cohort.

This year was our 21st retreat.

This is a Kokopelli.

Little did we know

Two decades ago, we came together as strangers and enrolled in the year-long Leadership Program through the Coaches Training Institute (CTI). CTI names each group. Our group was the Kokopellis.

I had just finished my Ph.D., was in the third year of my leadership coaching business and had become a new mom as a result of adopting an 11-month old baby boy from Russia.

Little did I know back then that we would become a group of 10 lifelong friends, and that we would go on to create our own yearly leadership retreat for the next two decades.

We are a group that now ranges in age from 55 to 80; five men and five women. Every year we spend five days together.

We’ve been at Bodega Harbour in Bodega Bay, California for the past four years and will be there in 2019 as well.

We saw the potential

We had a taste of how we could create a space that offered us true support and camaraderie that we couldn’t find anywhere else. And we wanted more. So we decided we would get together every year for our own leadership retreat.

Early on we recognized that there was something unique and valuable about what we were creating as a group. Somehow we knew that being a member of the Kokopellis held the potential for each of us to learn and grow in a way that would make our lives richer.
We are committed to living our lives by being present to the full range of emotions and being conscious about who we wanted to become. We’ve been through marriages and divorces, births and deaths, good health and health challenges. Our relationships with each other have weathered the ups and downs inherent in any relationship that is worth having.

Perspectives different from my own

What we recognized was how much we cared about each other. We developed a bond that allowed us to learn and grow, to listen, to ask questions, to ponder and to interact with people who had perspectives different from our own.

A hand to hold

We had a strong desire to seek to understand. We trusted each other. We held each other in high regard and we made room for our vulnerabilities. We made it safe to make mistakes, fail, fall and get up again. And we make sure there is a hand to hold and a word of encouragement whenever we need or reach for it.

It’s a commitment for sure. And one of the better ones I’ve ever made.

Lovely moments over dinner.

Courage

It would be easy to say I got lucky, but that would not be true. I recognized the value of being part of a group that had the courage to be honest and loving. I invested my time, my energy and my vulnerabilities.

It’s been worth every second and so much more.

Who are the people you invest your time, your energy and your vulnerabilities with?

If you can answer that question easily, good for you. If you’re not sure who those people are, take some time to reflect. If you don’t have them, consider how you could find them and cultivate relationships that care and support you—both personally and professionally.

It’s an investment worth making.